Down Syndrome Wednesday

I tried to make a schedule of sorts and I somehow decided that Wednesdays would be dedicated to Dudely and our Down Syndrome adventure.

As I have said many times before: he is doing great.

This Friday he will be 11 weeks post-op and other than a big scar on his chest everything is normal. Well, normal for him.

He does seem to be behind on some skills, but I think that could just be because of the surgery and recovery time.

He's rolling around all over the floor, which I love. I don't love that he rolls onto his belly while he's sleeping and can't seem to roll back over in his bed...so he gets upset in the middle of the night and mommy has to come to the rescue. 

He's starting to put his knees under his belly and push his butt into the air, but he doesn't have quite enough arm strength to lift the upper part of his body. 

Early intervention is having me work on sitting and pivoting with him. 

He doesn't have any teeth yet and I don't see any signs of them showing up any time soon. I read somewhere that kids with Down Syndrome tend to get their teeth later, so that's probably the reason for that.

He's had some good check-ups with the cardiologist and he has his 9 month check-up with the pediatrician next week. I expect that to go well, except he has to have his 6 month vaccinations again due to being on bypass during his surgery. I also hope to get a referral to the clinic that specializes in his condition.

Other peoples' reactions to his Down Syndrome has been mixed. My first experience with someone recognizing it was the new principal at the kids' school. She was the supervisor of some kind of special ed program through the board of education, so she had a lot of good things to say. Good first experience!

One of my coworkers said "he looks Asian" and referred to him as "chinky and happy".

I really don't mind that his features resembles those who are Asian, but I feel like there should be a more tactful way to comment about it. 

Yesterday Hubby's ex (who doesn't even know about it), who he was talking to as if she were BB because he didn't realize it was her, said, "Stop talking to me like I have Down Syndrome!"

Now I really don't want her to know about it. Before I didn't want her to know because it's none of her business, but now it's because I'm pretty sure she'll use it to make hurtful comments. 

Just about everyone who has seen him only comments on how cute he is (besides medical professionals and people who already know), not how he looks a little different or that something might be wrong with him. 

He's still a sweet and happy little boy. I wouldn't change a thing about him. 

Convictions

My bad start to this daily updating routine continues. Oops. Baby steps.

I spent most of my weekend doing overtime, so it doesn't feel like I really had a weekend. I woke up this morning and didn't know why my alarm was sounding so early. I had to find out what day it was before I realized that I was supposed to go to work.

First world problems.

My Sunday School class has been doing a study to read through the Bible in a year. I haven't kept up with my reading, though I haven't not read either. I can come up with as many excuses as I'd like, but nothing can really excuse me from doing it. Adding an extra 10 work hours to my week made me realize that I do have the time to do my daily reading. I think I also have the time to catch up on my reading. So that is what I'm going to work on.

Yesterday the ladies at church finished up a Bible study about the importance of the Sabbath and practicing "Shabbat". I think I spelled that correctly. I didn't keep up with the workbook as we met for our study (see a pattern here?), but it's such an in-depth study that I didn't want to rush through it just to say I kept up.

I think taking some time out of my day or week to clear my head, regroup, fix my focus back on God is going to be awesome. I should have already started, but I guess if it was so easy there wouldn't be a study to help us do it.

While I'm on the subject of convictions, all the hoopla of gay marriage and the supreme court and people placing judgment on others had me thinking.

First I was thinking about whether or not I have judged those who are LGBT. I don't think I have. I don't agree with the lifestyle. I don't think it's right. On the same token I don't think I've ever shown hatred or thought someone was a bad person just because that is the lifestyle he/she lives.

In fact, I've had at least one person who lives that lifestyle judge me because I am a Christian.

But in all this I realized that I have been judging Hubby's best friend because of bad choices he's made in his marriage. I've been judging him because it hits too close to home. I have been purposefully avoiding him. He would come over to our house, I would disappear. Hubby was going somewhere and he would be there? I'm not going. I have talked Hubby out of inviting him and his wife over for dinner. We planned a camping trip and when I found out that there was a good chance that he could be there, I told Hubby that he needs to find a different campground.

I would like to note that I haven't demanded that Hubby avoid him. Just myself. 

Anyway...

I had been thinking about how I treat people and realized that I have not been treating him the way I should be. Jesus, the One who I am supposed to be representing and striving to be like, would not treat someone this way. He would be spending time with him.

After I realized this I had to have the difficult talk with Hubby where I would admit that I was wrong. He's been giving me a hard time about this for a couple years, so he enjoyed my confession a little too much. He has left me alone since, though.

The final step would be to apologize to his friend and his wife for my behavior. I'm not sure I'm big enough yet to do that. We'll be going to the campground in August, so maybe by then I will feel more courageous and apologize if we see them there. I'm sure I deserve whatever response I would receive, but I don't know if I would take it well if it were negative.

I think if I can work on these one thing at a time, I'll be doing alright.

Start of daily postings?!

I've decided I want to try to write here daily.

Ha!

No, really...I'm going to try. Even if it's a goofy little quiz or a novel-long rant, I'm going to attempt it. Maybe I'll have a different theme for every day? For example: Mondays are about work, Tuesdays about Family, Wednesdays are about our Down Sydrome journey (although it's pretty uneventful at the moment), etc.

I wrote this yesterday and forgot to publish it. I'm off to a great start. 

In any case, I'll do a mishmash update now.

Dudely Dude is still doing great.

Hubby and I are doing great.

His job is going great.

My job is going great.

Just about everything is so...great.

It truly is.

I've been teleworking 3 days per week since the end of January. I also received a raise shortly after returning to work after my maternity leave and I've been authorized for some overtime for the last 3 weeks until who knows when. Hubby just accepted a job offer to be a supervisor at his work and his start date is this coming Sunday.

Hubby and I are on the same page now regarding the newest little one. He is glad he is here and says he loves him with all of his heart. Sometimes I don't see it because he doesn't interact or participate much in his care, but I remember he is a male and males can be different when it comes to children. I do see him playing or cuddling with him every once in a while and it is absolutely endearing.

We celebrated our second wedding anniversary about a month and a half ago. I can't believe it has been that long already. Despite all the rough stuff we have been through we still seem to be pretty nuts about each other. There are a lot of little things we still do that keep us connected on a deeper level, I think, like going to bed together every night and honoring our date night every Friday at home. He's still attracted to me and he still gives me butterflies.

Dudely is packing on weight now. He actually gets a big old pot belly after he eats and he's starting to sport the "detachable hands" look, as I call it. You know, that big crease some babies have on their wrists from all the chub.

Because of the additional income we're going to have we are look into adding onto our house or moving. I would much rather do the addition because I don't like moving and I like our house. We've also done some improvements to it that I don't want to leave behind. We had the wood floor on the entry level refinished, painted the kitchen and bought a new lighting fixture (not yet installed...waiting until we paint the ceiling), and we got all new kitchen appliances. It would be nice to move into a newer house with more bedrooms and maybe an extra bathroom that doesn't have monstrous spiders lurking around, but that's not worth the move for me.

I had what I think it my last visit with my therapist yesterday. She seems to think I can manage my anxiety on my own now. She said I taught her a lot about courage. I was like, "Courage? Me?" She said not many people would have made the decision I did about my baby (true) and I did a great job standing up to my husband in a gentle way and sticking my values. She thanked me. That made me feel pretty good. I had never thought I was courageous during that time.

All in all, things have been pretty spectacular around here. I think the only issue has been with BB's custody, but even then it hasn't been terrible-just stressful.

I'll try to update again tomorrow. I don't know what it will be about. I won't be home much and I'll have overtime to squeeze in, so it'll probably be very short. That's a plus!

So until next time...